“He’s not breathing, beginning chest compressions!” screamed the paramedic as he frantically tried to push life into the cold cadaver. Pushing life into me, I’m the cadaver. I’m looking down on myself, everything is so fuzzy. I take a step towards myself but a cold claw clenches my wrist. I turn to see something indescribable. It was like looking at a mirror of myself but it couldn’t have been more different. It was empty yet full, colorful and monochromatic, inhumanly human negative space.
“Am I dead?” I asked the incorporeal void standing next to me. We both looked down at my body as the paramedic still frantically tried to save me. He was joined by another and they rotated chest compressions and rescue breathing. The knees of their blue pants were absorbing the crimson puddle underneath them.
“Not quite, not yet,” said The Void, even though it was speaking to me from behind me it sounded like it was coming from every direction and in my head all at once. It spoke in a whisper but it sounded like an ensemble of hundreds of voices.
“Can I save myself?” I said reaching out a hand past the paramedic’s face. The Void held me just a hairbreadth out of reach. As I took a step forward I started to feel a pulling sensation towards The Void.
“No, you can’t.” The Void was almost solemn when it said this. The pulling became more intense.
“Wait I don’t want to go, I’m not ready. There’s so much I haven’t done! Let me go! Please!” Tears ran down my face in a strange mix of sadness, despair, and fear. I was being pulled into whatever this thing was and there was nothing I could do about it. The arm The Void first grabbed was elbow deep. It felt warm, comforting.
“Embrace us,” it whispered. I glanced over my shoulder one last time, my vision was blurry but I locked eyes with myself. My sapphire eyes were already clouded, it was like looking out on a misty lake. That was the last thing I saw before I was completely absorbed.When I opened my eyes again I was greeted by a truly breathtaking scene. I was free-falling amongst the stars. No, I wasn’t surrounded by stars I was surrounded by galaxies. Some flew by while others stayed stationary. New galaxies exploded into existence in a variety of colors while others quietly fizzled into nothingness. It was excitingly peaceful. My serenity was cut short by the omnipresent ensemble of voices, “What you are seeing now are just a few of the many universes occupying the vast expanse of infinite space.” Wait, did that thing just say universes? The Void nodded as if it knew what I was thinking. “It’s both breathtaking and disturbing.” The Void paused and looked at me, I think. It didn’t have eyes but I could feel its gaze. “I want you to pick your universe.”

“I’m sorry, what?”
“Pick your universe. Where is your home?”
“I don’t know,” I snapped, “why am I doing this anyway? I thought I was dead.”
“Don’t be mistaken, you are dead.” The Void was stern, it sounded angry. “Your car hydroplaned, you rolled off of the road, and then your car wrapped around a tree. You suffered ulnar fractures on both arms from the impact,” I felt a sharp pain in my forearms. “You suffered friction burns along your face and hands from the airbag going off,” my cheeks and palms became hot. “You tore your right ACL,” the pain was becoming unbearable. “You severed your C3, C6, T5, and L1 vertebrae when your car hit the tree,” I couldn’t move. I couldn’t feel anything, was I paralyzed? “Those were just a few of the injuries you suffered, the list goes on. You are dead, nothing can change that and even if you weren’t, you don’t want to go back to that body.” The Void snapped his fingers and all the pain went away, “I did not wish to do that but I need you to focus on now, not what was. Now please, pick your universe,” The void was quiet again. I turned around and I was never so happy to be able to move. I’m not sure why but one tiny spec seemed to call to me, I felt drawn to it. I pointed at it and everything became black again. “Very good Jeremy, ” called The Void.
There was a blinding light and The Void and I sat in the corner of a room. There was a woman laid out on a table and doctors were cutting into her inflated stomach. “Look in that corner,” said The Void. I looked beyond the lab equipment and in the dark corner of the room I could just barely make out another figure. It looked just like The Void but taller and more feminine.
“What is that thing, I mean- what is that?” I asked.
“That thing is another being like us,” The Void growled.
“And what exactly are you?”
“We are a collective conscience of overseers. Together but separate, many but one.”
“That explains, nothing.” The Void let out a sigh.
“You’re not making this very easy.”
“Sorry.” I looked down at the floor like a scolded child, “Continue.”
“Thank you. We are what you might consider ‘Grim Reapers”. We collect the consciousness of those who have passed and deal with them appropriately.” The Figure in the corner moved a step closer to the woman getting the cesarian. “What are they doing,” I said moving towards The Void, I may have raised my voice a little.
“She is collecting.”
“Collecting what?” My question was met with silence. The void just gestured for me to watch. I turn and wait quietly. The Collector slowly inched closer to the tables. The operating room began to erupt in a cacophony of noises and screams. The monitor began to flatline. Step. The lead doctor shouted, “Code blue! Get the crash cart!” Step. One nurse ran out of the room, her new shoes squeak on the white tile floor. Step. “Can we save her doctor?” asked a nurse. Step. “No, but there may still be time to save the child.” Step. The figure loomed over the body and watched the doctors frantically try to recover the unborn child. I was so focused on the doctors that I missed the woman appearing next to The Collector. Her auburn hair blocked her face but I could tell she was crying. Her petite frame fell to the floor and she screamed in a way only a grieving mother could. I couldn’t tell you how long the screaming went on. It only stopped when it was joined by another scream, everyone looked at the sound of the noise and in the doctor’s arm was a crying baby. The woman got up and walked to the doctor who was currently swaddling the child. Before he completely enwrapped the child the woman reached out her hand and, if only for the briefest moment, the baby grabbed her hand. Then the moment was gone. The woman turned towards The Collector and started sobbing again. The Collector walked up and held her, rubbing her back and wiping her tears. The Collector leaned close to her ear and she looked at it and nodded. It helped her up and they moved to the door. The Void and I followed.
In the lobby, amongst all the people in hospital gowns and their family members and people by themselves, there was one person that stuck out like a sore thumb. A dark-skinned middle-aged man was sitting in a chair, his neck cranked backward at a ninety-degree angle. His eyes were closed and he wasn’t moving. Just when I thought I was going to see another person die he let out a monstrous snore, like a chainsaw. Thank god, I thought to myself.
The dead woman stroked his face and laid down, resting her head on his lap. She quietly sobbed. “Why are you having me watch this?” The Void again said nothing. I looked around for a sign or explanation but I was only greeted by half a dozen more “collectors”. That’s when I noticed there were other people who weren’t really there. Many of the people in hospital gowns cried with their grieving family. Others just quietly watched in shock. There was an elderly gentleman who just sat next to an elderly woman, holding her hand. A single tear rolled down her cheek. The door behind me opened, passing right through me. “Mr. Burns,” said the doctor as he walked through. The snoring man coughed as he shot upright. “What’s the good news doc, are ya gonna take me to ma girls?” Mr. Burns was met with a solemn look. He got up and Mrs. Burns followed, holding onto him for dear life. “Stop yankin’ my chain doc, where’re ma girls?” His hopeful smile broke, “Please tell me my girls are okay, please doctor.”
“There were some complications, we couldn’t save her.” Mr. Burns stormed up to the doctor and just as she tried to step back in fear, he hugged her. “Please, tell me you’re lying. Claire…” he trailed off as he squeezed the doctor.
“Mr… Mr. Burns… I- I can’t breathe.” The doctor said turning red. Claire hugged Mr. Burns from behind and he released his grip.
“How about Zoey,” he said, trying his best to act tough; However, the stream of tears betrayed that act.
“Follow me please,” the doctor held open the door for Mr. Burns to follow through, which he did. Claire stopped at the threshold. The collector approached her and grabbed her hand, again she leaned to Claire’s ear, and then the two walked through the door.
“Shall we go?” The Void said scaring the life out of me. I was so focused on what was going on that I forgot he was behind me. If I was still alive I might’ve had a heart attack. I didn’t say anything, I just turned and followed Claire. The doctor led us to an empty nursery. In the middle, there was a single baby, fast asleep. “Here she is Mr. Burns,” the doctor said, lifting the child, “nine pounds and six ounces, a healthy and beautiful baby girl.” The doctor Gingerly handed off the infant and Mr. Burns began to rock it back and forth. “Hi there Zoey,” the baby opened her eyes and looked up to her cooing father. Her green eyes popped against her honey bronze skin, they were her mom’s. “I’m your Popa and,” Mr. Burns’ voice cracked as if he had been planning this introduction for years, now he was missing a crucial piece of the plan. Mr. Burns tried to keep a smile but it just distorted his face further. Zoey began to cry and so did Mr. Burns. Claire was waiting further back during this entire experience, probably out of fear. The Collector pushed her forwards. She reached her hands out and stroked her husband’s face and held her daughter’s hand. Their crying died down and she shifted her hand from her husband’s face to his lower back. She leaned her head on his shoulder and gazed at Zoey with him. If I didn’t know any better I would have assumed it was just another happy family. But of course, it didn’t last. The Collector tugged at Claire’s arm and she gave a nod of acceptance. She leaned in and kissed Zoey on the forehead. Then she looked up to her husband who was just barely holding back his tears. She paused a moment, admiring every detail, every bump. Then she got on her tiptoes and gave him a peck on the cheek. To my surprise, he looked in her direction, not at her but passed her. Then she walked into the collector and Mr. Burns sobbed, almost as if he knew she left for good.
Snap.
“Why did you show me that,” I asked floating around space again.
“We wanted to show you what it is we do.”
“But why should I care, it has nothing to do with me.”
“It has everything to do with you. We want you to join us.”
“Join you?”
“Yes, join us. We know you spent your life helping people.”
“You don’t know anything about me,” I shouted.
“You were a teacher for eight years, in your free time you volunteered at a homeless shelter in lower Manhattan. You always kept a bag of cash on you in case you ran into a homeless person so you could take them to a store and buy them whatever clothes or food they would like. We know about Henry McKinnley.” That struck a nerve.
“You keep his name out of your Goddamn mouth.” Before I knew it my hands were wrapped around the voids neck. It was flaming cold but I didn’t let go.
“He was your teacher, when the recession hit he lost his job and became an alcoholic. When you found him on the streets years later you started all of your volunteer work because you thought you could help him. You did a good job with keeping company until one day he just stopped showing up.”
“Shut up, just shut up,” I released my grip, all of my strength was gone.
“They found his body this morning. That is what brought you to that road. You wanted to die Jeremy, and that’s understandable, you lost the one person you tried to keep. But now you’ve got the chance to help countless more people. You can comfort them during the most important moment of their existence. Join us, together we can help people until the end of time.” The option was tempting but it was just that, an option.
“You make it sound like I have a choice, do I?”
“Of Course. I could return you to your world and you can wander there, it wouldn’t be lonely but you would be very much alone. There is of course reincarnation but you will forget everything about this experience and your previous life. Then there is heaven which is more or less how Christianity depicts it. Lastly is Hell, think Dante’s inferno, we still can’t determine how Alighieri was able to describe it so accurately.”
“I read the book, I think I can make it out of there.” I think that made The Void laugh. “So if I were to join you, what would happen?”
“If you’re wondering what would happen to your soul, it would remain yours. You would contribute your thoughts and feelings to help us comfort the recently deceased and help them pass on.” It seemed pretty obvious that this was the best choice and I think I may be able to enjoy this. It would be nice to be able to help people. “Alright what do I have to do?”
“You just have to walk into us. We also think it may bring you comfort to know that we helped Henry McKinnley pass on. He was worried about you, ‘he was my favorite student and my best friend’,” The Void said in Mr. McKinnley’s voice and I began to cry. “‘When you meet him, thank him for me. Tell him he did good.”
I wiped my eyes, “Thank you,” I stepped forward and everything went dark.